Here’s how they responded:
Respondents had to choose one answer and, based on the data, we found that the majority of those surveyed chose the response that stated that they respect people whom they admire. We also learned that some of the respondents think that people in authoritative positions are entitled to respect, while others acknowledge that they give people respect if they’ve earned it.
One could draw conclusions, for example, that our respondents do not immediately respect people simply because of their title, ranking, or position of importance, and they do not necessarily think that people have to earn their respect. You could say that those surveyed are selective about who they respect, but if they admire someone for any reason, they are more likely to respect them.
After reading the results of our survey, I asked a 17-year old young man how he defined respect. He told me that everyone deserves respect until they lose it, because too many people disrespect others just for their political views, religion, gender, race, and so on. I like his way of thinking, because many people disrespect others just for their political views, religion, gender, race, and so on. Recently, there has been research around what is called mutual recognition respect - in other words, we respect each other simply for being human. Everyone wants and needs to feel connected. We have always needed a community to survive, so connecting is instinctual. However, it can be challenging to connect when there is a lack of respect.
In the workplace, think about a time you felt disrespected. Were you publicly reprimanded by your boss? Did a peer go over your head when you didn’t agree with his/her course of action? These types of situations can make you feel frustrated and stuck, and you believe that any attempt you make to rectify the situation will fail. Yet, we know that given the right skill set, people can effectively deal with others who have made us feel disrespected. At the end of the day, you are 50% responsible for the condition of all of your relationships, including the ones in the aforementioned scenarios.
If everyone deserves respect until they lose it, and I lose respect for someone, then I have a decision to make. I can get angry, resentful, or blame the person. A better choice is to practice emotional intelligence. If the relationship is important, I need to use my influence skills to deal with the situation. Knowing the different Influence Styles and how to formulate an Influence Action Plan gives me the power of choice as to how I approach this type of challenging situation. If you feel disrespected, and the relationship is important, and you need to get work done - you need to influence with positive power!
Situation Management Systems, Inc.